It's the Crazy Family...da da da da..snap snap...

That's my pathetic attempt at the written version of the Addam's Family theme song. Sad huh?
Well you've learned all you can about me.....or at least all you can without getting to know me personally.....so now you want to meet the rest? You really ARE crazy aren't you??

Now as I tell you all about the crazy family....you will begin to understand why I am One Crazy Mama! Ours is no typical household!

Let's start with Madison. She is my only child...though many days it feels like I have a houseful! She is 10 years old....in 4th grade....and a true DIVA at heart. She tends to be a bit of a drama queen. Hard to believe having me for a mom*!! Her favorite things to do are play board games, dress up in various "cool" outfits, listen to music, watch Disney and Nick, play with her friends, sing and dance. She vows she WILL be a superstar when she grows up. Her dream is to be the NEXT American Idol. Believe me...this girl WILL be on a stage somewhere. Though as much as she takes her clothes off and on....it might not be the kind of stage I am hoping for**. Madison attends an AWESOME school you will see me mention often. It is a charter school for the arts and academics here in Michigan. I can't say enough good things about them. I LOVE that school!! You will hear about Madison VERY often. Partly because she is the most important thing in the world to me. And partly because...well...with Madison around life is NEVER boring.

Now that we've covered the Princess. Let's cover the queen. No...not me. I wish I was that important. I am talking about Sophie. Sophie is our newest family member. She is a half terrier/half chihuahua puppy. She is almost a year old. She is tiny. And she is so ugly she is cute. LOL. Seriously. She loves to have her belly rubbed....get doggie treats (her favorite is bacon)....and bark at strangers. To Sophie anyone who doesn't live here (no matter how many times they've been over) is a stranger. I swore I'd never have a yip yip dog. And here she is. Madison's first puppy.

Now that sounds like enough in the house right? Wrong! On to the rest....

Nana....You will often hear mention of Nana. Nana is my mom. And another drama queen :) I often share conversations between Nana and Madison because...well....they are just plain funny. It's like two kids. But anyways...Nana lives here with us. Though I'd bet most days she wishes she didn't. She was the original crazy mama. But since she doesn't blog, I took the title.

Brian....I may refer to Brian from time to time...though not often by name....I may call him the ex...madison's dad....or any other term of endearment I might come up with (the idiot....stupid...you get the idea lol...kidding Brian). Brian is Madison's dad...aka my ex-husband. Remember how we weren't technically together but weren't technically divorced?? Yea it gets stranger. LOL. Though we haven't been together in 7 years (there I go feeling old again)....Brian currently resides here with us. It's a strange situation....but its convenient for us both at this time for many reasons and they don't include me needing someone to send to the store for ice cream at 2am LOL.

Bear....Bear is the oldest of our family. She is a mutt. She was brought home to my brother about 16-17 years ago....I lost count.....and since then has become my moms dog. She has moved around the country with Nana.....and now she resides here in Michigan with us. Poor Bear is about on her last leg. She can't move around good and needs assistance at getting up and down. You may see me moan and complain about Bear from time to time. Or you may see me feel bad for her. Depends on what mood strikes me. Bear's favorite things are people food, barking for attention and sleeping. Now there is the life!

And finally we have Sebastian. Ahhh Sebastian is our only male (well unless you count Brian). He is a cat. And honestly I am not sure how old he is. But he's the quiet one in the house. His favorite things are curling up on grocery bags, eating dog food and getting his cat treats when Sophie goes potty.

You will also see mention of the following (they are spread out from Chicago and Wisconsin to North Carolina and Virginia):

Uncle Moose: My brother
Aunt Sissy: My aunt
Pepaw: My grandma
Uncle Scott and Aunt Brandy: Technically my cousins but Madison calls them uncle/aunt
Caleb and Christopher: Scott and Brandy's newborn twin boys
Uncle Jeremy and Aunt Amber: Again my cousins but Uncle/Aunt to Madison
Sydney, Jayden and Isiah: Uncle Jeremy and Aunt Amber's kids
Grandma and Grandpa: Brian's parents
The Britches: Though they aren't technically family...this group of wonderful ladies is like a second family to me. You will see them mentioned a lot. Because they mean a LOT.

So there you have my family. See why my life is crazy?? Now you may ask...why don't I have the rest of the pictures up top on my header? Well because I consider my immediate family to be me, Madison and Sophie. Because if my mom moves, Sebastian and Bear go with her. And who knows how long the arrangement with Brian living here will last. So...thats why. Besides...there's not enough room for all of those pictures!

*Sarcasm often used in this blog
** Oh come on...it was FUNNY

Crazy Mama 101....

Ahhh the dreaded about me page. Where I must actually talk about....ME. I hate talking about me. But you are either here by mistake....or you came to learn about me. Either way...I guess I am stuck talking about me.

Though One Crazy Mama suits me most days....it isn't really my name. Imagine that? My name is actually Jenni....thats my story and I'm sticking to it!! I am 33 years old...which feels awfully young and then I look back on how long its been since this or that happened and realize...I'm getting old. I live in the North Pole....well not really....it's really Michigan....but 10 months* out of the year it FEELS like the North Pole.

Seriously, though...I love Michigan. We actually have four seasons. Summer (which is about 1 month), Winter, Rain and Snow. LOL. Nahhh I'm fibbing again (or am I?). Michigan has been home to us for about 6 years now. It's hard to imagine living anywhere else. Though I do miss my family and old friends a LOT.

I am technically not married....but I am also technically not divorced. Confuse ya yet?? We got separated about 7 years ago (told ya I am getting old).....but we've never gotten the official divorce. Guess its just never been a big priority in the grand scheme of all that costs money.

So what do I do?? Well I am a full time ebayer. I am a trading assistant (which means I sell other people's stuff for them) as well as selling my own items. It keeps me very busy because despite what you may think...its a LOT of work. But I absolutely LOVE it. What other job could I shop, buy things, then turn around and sell them and make money? It feeds that shopping addiction while not taking my income.

I am also a Girl Scout Leader. I co-lead a troop with my friend (and Madison's BFF's mom) Kris. We have a crazy group of 4th and 5th grade girls that keep us on our toes. So far they haven't tried to sneak out and see boys on our camping trips....but I just KNOW its coming soon.

And of course I am the crazy mama to Madison!

For my free time (isn't that an oxymoron to a mom??) I like to hang with the Britches.....read....design graphics....and sleep. Yes I am at the age where sleep is considered a hobby! My favorite books are the Twilight series (of course!!), legal thrillers and basically any drama type book. I don't do much tv but I MUST catch American Idol, Greys Anatomy and Army Wives. I also like to play board games...with trivial pursuit and scene it being my faves. Oh and I enjoy playing the wii with Madison.

During the warm month*....I like to go to the beach (don't even go there....it IS a beach...Lake Michigan looks like an ocean dangit)....go camping....ride bikes....shoot basketball with Madison (I can play a mean game of horse)....grill out...and make smores over the fire!

I LOVE to travel. I dream of visiting New York City. So far my favorite place to go by far is Chicago. I love seeing new places. I hope to someday travel abroad. And if I have my way, retirement will be spent in a motor home touring the U.S.

Did I mention I like to shop??

Oh and I have a secret new obsession. It's called Mobsters. It's an application on Myspace. It's a twisted hobby. But hey...I'm a twisted kinda gal.

I've never been known as a "religious" person. But I am very very much a Christian. I put that out there because the faith I have is so strong. I've witnessed the power of that faith in my own life as well as that of others. So from time to time...you may see mention of that.

And my family is just as crazy as me. Don't let them convince you otherwise!!

Oh and I swear I am only slightly medicated :)

Mi Vida Loca. My Crazy Life.

So grab a cup of coffee....or glass of wine....or hey go all out and grab the liquor....and sit back as you journey into the day to day mishaps that make up my crazy life!

*some facts may have been exaggerated to make the story more interesting

mixing things up a bit...

I am about to have a few posts that seem way out of order. But I have a method to my madness. So bear with me. I am still getting things all organized around here.

Oh yeah, I went there!

As you may or may not know....Madison has been very sick. Actually we all have. But the first few days of it consisted of vomiting and diarrhea. Not a fun combination. And all I can say about that is thank heavens for depends. But that is another story for another day.

This story consists of how Madison couldn't take her meds for several days.

This is never a pretty site. These are strong medications and not taking them is dangerous. Especially to third parties like myself. But when you can't even keep down water...what are you to do??

So fast forward a few days to when she is feeling well enough to yell and scream. In our house you know you are getting better when you feel well enough to yell or scream LOL.

So Madison is out of it. By it, I mean control. Angry, screaming, hitting, throwing things. You know...a typical bad day around here. (Don't you feel bad for thinking its a bad day when your kids don't nap or something?? LOL)

So she is in mid meltdown. Demanding I give her the computer. And she is quite the stubborn child. But not nearly as stubborn as her mama. So I am standing my ground. And she is fighting. Yelling. Trying to hit though not being very successful as I hold her arms. It's a very serious moment. One that would shock most american households and weaken most typical moms. But not me. Nope I will stand strong. I will stay firm.

And in the middle of said tantrum....I kid you not.....she says in an extremely serious tone

"I hate you. OH YEAH I Went There"

and she proceeds to snap her fingers. Remember that old 3 snaps in a z formation? What was that from, In Living Color? Anyways....she does this. The worst part is she does it sooooo seriously.

And I am stunned.

And here is my precious daughter yelling at me and demanding I give her what she wants.

And I am trying not to laugh.

Because I tell you.....no matter what else she has said and done in this argument. No matter how wrong it may be.

THAT was funny.

But if I laugh it only makes things worse.

So I sit and continue to try and reason with her. While inside I am laughing my butt off at what pops out of her mouth at the oddest times.

The funniest thing is that Madison can sit for 3 straight hours trying to tell knock knock jokes (trust me, this is based on experience) and they are NOT funny. I mean comedian she is NOT.

But when she is not trying....when being funny is the last thing on her mind....out pops something like this and she is hilarious.

Oh yeah...I went there.

Ignore the mismatch...

I am currently learning how to do my own templates. Yes I am that OCD. So I made my own header. Taken right up the road from me might I add :)

So until I learn the rest, my decor won't match.

Sorry about that

Carry on now.

Redecorating...

Well as much as I LOVE Twilight and Edward....I got tired of looking at the same old blog. So I have redecorated. How do you like it?

Eventually I'd like to have a custom template. But first I either need to make some $$ or learn how to do them :)

Welcome to the world!

Today Christopher and Caleb joined our world. They are twin boys of my cousins Scott and Brandy. Unfortunately Brandy was only 32 weeks along. So the boys have some hurdles to overcome. I am asking for all of you who read this to say a prayer for all of them today. So far the boys are doing well considering.

I am very sad that I can't be there to be with my family at this time.

But let's focus on the positive....

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY CHRISTOPHER AND CALEB!!! I can't wait to meet you :)