Say What???

We've always had what amounted to a phrase of the moment or word of the moment. With Madison, it is to be expected. She picks up a phrase and that is ALL she says.

We've been through:

Whatever!!
Oh No You Didn't!
Oh Snap!
That's right, I went there!
I know, right?
(insert name) say what?
Sweet Niblets

and the list goes on. And yes I realize the child watches too much Disney.

I never know what might pop out of her mouth and become the new thing to say. So I just go with the flow, giggle a lot and wait until it changes again.

But one day that all changed. It was a day not too long ago. One of the very few days of summer we actually had this year. We were enjoying a nice afternoon at the beach. Playing in the water. When out of the blue popped the question i'd been avoiding.....

Mom what is sex?

So as I stand there waist deep in Lake Michigan contemplating what I was going to say....and deciding if I wanted to postpone it for another time or answer....she got impatient.

Mom you promised you would tell me.

SNAP. That's right, she went there.

So I decide honesty is the best policy.

Sex is when a man inserts his penis into a woman's vagina.

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW gross.

(whew!)

So we carry on with our day after a brief conversation on how she may just adopt babies, which I fully supported LOL.

But that was not the end, my friends.

It seems that Madison has adopted a new word.

Penis.

I swear she can work penis or sex into ANY conversation. Mostly penis though. Sex still grosses her out.

We are talking about a game for her birthday party.

Oh that reminds me of people using their penis.

We are talking about pulling her pants up

You know what else would be bad? A boy showing me his penis

I mean I don't want the child to believe it's a bad word. But do we really have to talk about it two or three times a day?? At what point does it become too much?? And what happens when we are at walmart and I say Do you want to get bananas? and my cell phone wielding 11 year old drama queen announces to the whole store that bananas look a lot like a penis.

Sadly we've talked so much about penises that tonight she asked me to clarify what a vagina was. Hello. It's the part you actually have. Focus on that for a while.

Come on Hannah Montana, come out with a new saying! We need a new phrase around here.

On a side, silly and pathetic note....I have recently adopted "check it out". Anyone who has seen Sonny With A Chance will get that reference.

Well I am off. Hopefully I won't soon be doing installments of "Conversations from the produce aisle"